Ten Tips to Help Resist Pornography
A post from Paladin Actual
Here’s a quote from the Matt Walsh Show Ep 1215 (Timestamp 106:22-106:56) responding to someone struggling with an addiction to pornography:
And if you want to stop doing something negative, again the best advice, the only advice anyone can give you, is to simply “Stop doing that”.
“I’m doing this but I don’t want to do it”, well don’t.
“But it’s hard!” Ok, well then it’s hard, so then just do the difficult thing. That’s it. Endure the difficulty, that’s it.
And that’s advice that you can follow, because it’s not an addiction. It’s a lot of other things, none of them good, but it’s not an addiction.
Imagine you are listening to this and you are struggling with a pornography addiction. Matt Walsh claims that the only advice that will help you is to just “stop it”. How does that make you feel?
If you’ve been unable to resist sin thus far, and you are told it’s just a willpower issue, maybe do you come to the conclusion that it’s hopeless? After all, you’ve tried to exercise your willpower before, and it wasn’t enough, so maybe it’s time to just quit trying, just give up and give into sin since the one thing that will stop the sin is the one thing you don’t have enough of.
The good news I have for you is that your case is not hopeless. You don’t need to give up, that willpower is not the only factor, or even the most important factor in battling your addiction to pornography. Most importantly that though you continue to struggle with this sin, the death of Christ covers even this one.
Memorize this verse, Romans 5:6-8
For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die—But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us
Your sin might be a secret, but it isn’t a secret to God, and even though He is aware of your shame He loved you enough to take the shame on Himself and nail it to the cross. Because He loves you that much.
“Is pornography addiction a real thing?” – this is the question that Matt Walsh of the Daily Wire, a Roman Catholic, answers with a resounding “no”. He certainly opposes pornography, it is harmful both to the individual and to others, but he rejects that it should be classified as an addiction.
In his statement from the end of his show, he talks about sin, but he never talks about it in a spiritual way. He talks about in a purely physical fashion. His focus is on coercing or convincing people simply to stop sinning. Even though you are body and spirit, he neglects the spiritual entirely, and never once mentions the forgiveness of Christ. With any of the good points he makes, he utterly fails in understanding the problem and providing a solution for the Christian who struggles with pornography.
I’m going to try to give you 10 helpful Biblical tips to help you in your ongoing struggle with your pornography addiction.
I’ll start it off by giving you a few more Bible verses to keep in mind through this process, and then I’ll explain 10 simple, practical, and Biblically-founded tips to help you in your battle. Here we go.
SECTION 1 VERSES
The first section of the Bible I want you to consider is from Romans chapter 7. This is written by Paul, and Apostle of Jesus Christ, a teacher of His Word, and by all accounts, a very holy man.
Remember how Matt Walsh told you to just “Stop it”? To stop sinning? Listen to Paul’s struggle with sin and see if it sounds similar to yours. If the solution to repeated sin was to just will yourself to quit, then Paul never would have written this:
Romans 7:15-25
For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.
So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.
So even Paul, a holy man of God, continued to struggle, his Christian spirit against his flesh. Unless you are more holy and a better Christian than St Paul himself, you are certainly going to have a similar struggle. Find comfort here, not that this is an excuse to sin, but you are not alone in struggling with your sin, every Christian, even one as great as an Apostle, has struggled with their recurring sin.
The next verse I want you to consider is from Galatians chapter 5, verses 16 and 17:
But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.
Your flesh struggles against the Spirit. Your desire to sin is in competition to your desire to love your neighbor and love God. This might be intimidating because you will have to constantly struggle against sin, but this is also a comfort because it means that when you focus on doing those spiritually good things. When you act out the fruit of the spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, you are taking territory away from sin.
This is a war between your flesh and spirit, if you want to take back territory from your sinful flesh, don’t just leave that area of the map empty, fill it with good things. Don’t just take time away from your addiction and sit there nervously trying to resist, fill it with prayer, singing hymns, spending time with other Christians, reading the Bible, acting out God’s love to others.
It will be easier for you to replace moments of sin with moments of love than it will be if you try to just resist sin and leave those time slots open.
The last verses I want you to keep in mind before I get into the 10 tips are from Ephesians 6 verses 10 through 16. This section of Scripture tells you about the armor of God, a spiritual armor. God does not let you go to war undefended, but has given you spiritual protection, He continues to look out for you, and desires that you trust in the protection He has given you:
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication.
To review, first, Romans 7, you are not fighting this war alone – every Christian saint has struggled in this battle, and God is on your side.
Second, Galatians 5, when you strive to take territory in your life back from sin, don’t leave it empty. It will be too hard to maintain, it is much easier to resist sin if you are actively doing something incompatible with sin, like prayer and praise.
Third, Ephesians 6, God is aware of your struggle, He has given you armor to protect you and prepare you for it.
Finally, you must absolutely remember that this war against sin was already won by Christ on the cross when His sacrifice fully paid for all of your sin. For every time you fail a battle, rush back to Christ and the victory in His forgiveness will be yours. You cannot outsin God’s love.
Alright, let’s get into it, here are 10 practical, Biblical tips to help you wage war against your pornography addiction.
1. First, Pray. Sin is a spiritual matter even more than it is a physical matter. You cannot win a spiritual battle without God. Talk to Him constantly, ask Him for forgiveness, strength, tell Him about your struggles, ask Him to strengthen your faith. You cannot succeed in your action if Christ has not succeeded in your heart.
2. Second – Discipline yourself. In 1 Corinthians 9:27, Paul says that he disciplines his body, he trains himself physically to better resist sin. Make yourself used to being uncomfortable, not that it makes you more holy, but if you are familiar with resisting weaker urges, you will be more prepared to resist stronger ones. Discipline means training, you have to start with light weights before you work up to heavy ones, but start.
3. Third – Remove triggers. If something causes you to sin, remove it from your path. Set boundaries. Don’t be alone with your computer, move it into a public room. Don’t be alone with your phone if that is a temptation, leave it to charge out in the living room, whatever you have to do. Obviously, you can circumvent these challenges to sin, but you are setting up speed bumps, not road blocks. The slower you have to go to sin, the easier it is to turn away.
4. Fourth – Recognize victories. Every day you spent resisting your sin is a victory. Don’t expect perfection, but chip away at failure. If you consumed porn 30 days in a month, and you resist it every other day, you’ve just taken 15 days away from that sin. That’s 15 days of victory you wouldn’t have had otherwise.
5. Fifth – Make it impossible. When you are tempted, engage in behavior that is incompatible with sin. If you have a laptop, go sit with family, go out of the house, do something that takes away the possibility. If being home alone allows for too much temptation, go to the gym, go spend some time with others, go for a walk. If you want to sin, but you can’t sin, you won’t sin.
6. Sixth - Resist Tunnel Vision. Do not let focus on this sin consume you, if you conquer it, don’t feel that your life is now beyond reproach, if you fail to conquer it, don’t lose track of other sins you are succeeding against. There are 10 commandments, not just one. Remember all the sin that needs forgiveness.
7. Seventh - You are not alone, This is one of the most common sins in the modern world, don’t feel alone as though you only struggle with it, this is a battle with many Christians against evil.
8. Eight - It will be difficult, it will be miserable, it may take years, but it is possible to try, and with God it is possible to succeed. Success will not look like you living a life without sin starting tomorrow, success will look like you being forgiven today, and every day afterward. Then as a forgiven child of God, continuing to struggle against your sins until the day you are called home to Christ. That is victory, a repentant Christian is a forgiven Christian, and a forgiven Christian has already one.
9. Ninth - Remember your identity, you are a Christian. Rather than trying to resist the action rather than saying “I shouldn’t do this”, say “I am a Christian, this behavior is contrary to my identity. Christians should not behave this way.” Make porn an issue of identity, not of effort
10. Tenth - Repent, be forgiven, try again, repeat. Christ died on the cross for your sins, where you failed in resisting sin, He succeeded in forgiving it. As a Christian, do not let your focus on resisting sin overshadow your focus on Christ’s forgiveness.
Hopefully this list of tips helps you not only in your struggle against, sin, but as a reminder that you are a beloved forgiven child of God. At the end of the day, winning against sin is accomplished by Christ when all your sins are forgiven.
Only now when you are a saved, forgiven child of God can you struggle to resist sin, knowing that your victory is already ensured, not in your effort, but in Christ’s death on the cross.
Ten tips:
1. Pray continually.
2. Discipline yourself.
3. Remove triggers.
4. Recognize victories.
5. Make sin impossible.
6. Resist tunnel vision.
7. You are not alone.
8. It will be difficult.
9. Know your identity.
10. Repent, rinse, repeat.